There is a plastic bag mafia in Finland, I'm sure of it, and sooner or later I'll be able to prove it.
Hell, they're expensive! I mean, not one by one of course. But in the end of the month they sum up to quite a bill... and where do they all end up? Deep inside the trash bin! And then I need to go back to the supermarket to buy some more. I've never bought plastic bags in my life untill now, so I've decided to make the math. 1 plastic bag per day for trash, seven days a week, 20cents per bag give or take. It sums up to over 40 bucks a month... at the end of the year it represents almost 500 bucks. Hell I can do a lot with 500 bucks. I know, I know, I've started to buy cheaper trash bags already, but still... come on! There has to be a better solution. I know they're made out of petrol, and petrol keeps rising. But you guys shouldn't turn it into a trendy thing, to use a plastic bag I mean.
Its surely a governmental conspiracy plot to make the common citizen invest in petrol, even if they don't drive... well it could be.
Everyday I walk the street to realize people walk proudly with their re-used plastic bag, almost as saying 'Yes I've picked it up before leaving the house. I'm ecological, I'm reusing it, doesn't it look nice on me?'
Do you really need an answer, miss and mr Finn? 'Not really!'
Finns are deciding what plastic bag is good enough for trash, and which is useable at the street. Doesn't that seem rather odd to any of you?
If a preety girl carries a plastic bag, she'll always be a girl carrying a plastic bag. She won't look that sexy really. And it becomes even worse when you're shopping in your training suit. Please, what the Hell is that? That's not the trendy Hellsinki I imagined.
Buy a cloth bag and wear a short skirt and a long jacket. It's that simple, and just throw your trash in the bin... who cares really?
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Silence
This past month I exemplified on the blog how Finns treat silence. With respect. Total, incredible, and silly respect.
I’ve been having the most incredible silence conversations ever… I seriously do not understand how Finns could survive for so long without that primordial element that makes us human, speech.
THEY DON’T TALK. Well, obviously they do sometimes to ask directions, otherwise they would get lost in their marvellous and long subway system. But other than that, they don’t speak much. They try to nod as much as they can. Trains trips are silent, bus rides are boring.
Latin people have the same problem, we don’t talk. We SCREAM out loud so everybody knows our story, even when we are on a bus ride. Basically, wherever we are, hell breaks loose.
The first time I realized it was right after I started living in Hellsinki. I was lost and trying to figure out a way to reach Central Station so I asked someone who was passing by, very cordially, ‘Excuse me, could you tell me the way to the train station?’. He stopped and looked directly at me for a second, then turned his back on me and kept walking. I could not believe that had just happened. Maybe there was some sort of a space continuum void and I lost part of my life, the part where he was explaining me the way. Maybe I reached hell and no one would ever speak to me again. Maybe I went nuts… but all those thoughts vanished minutes later after looking to a woman with nice curves and great legs covered by black stockings, passing by, which made me realize that it was not hell yet.
Days later I started using the bus to reach the construction area where my team is designing a new apartment building near Hellsinki. When I went there for the first time, I thought that maybe something happened in the city, which made everybody silent and stun. The following trips were exactly the same. I could hear the humming of the engine, the wheels crashing the rubble outside, but no speech. ‘Maybe something is wrong with me’ I thought. ‘Maybe I used my earphones too loud and now my mom’s worst predictions were true and my ears lost contact with the world around me.’ But it wasn’t me, it was them, Finns. Nobody spoke…
…
The whole trip, everybody was silent. I heard a cell phone ring once, but the girl who answered it was so silent, that I couldn’t even hear her. Amazing. When I got home and asked my girlfriend, she said that was normal. ‘We’re not supposed to let strangers know what’s going on our lives’ Now that sounded boring. So I got to keep myself to myself now? What kind of life would that be?
But then I realised. They do that in phone calls too! Hell, that doesn’t make any sense either. I was talking to an engineer not long ago and I was questioning him some structural concerns… but after he replied some ‘Yoo, no nii.’ (by the way, that sounds like a Monty Python sentence) he went silent on me. There was NO answer on the other side because he decided to think, with me hanging on the other side of the line. ‘Hell! I’m paying here! Can you give me a damn answer today?’
I’ve been having the most incredible silence conversations ever… I seriously do not understand how Finns could survive for so long without that primordial element that makes us human, speech.
THEY DON’T TALK. Well, obviously they do sometimes to ask directions, otherwise they would get lost in their marvellous and long subway system. But other than that, they don’t speak much. They try to nod as much as they can. Trains trips are silent, bus rides are boring.
Latin people have the same problem, we don’t talk. We SCREAM out loud so everybody knows our story, even when we are on a bus ride. Basically, wherever we are, hell breaks loose.
The first time I realized it was right after I started living in Hellsinki. I was lost and trying to figure out a way to reach Central Station so I asked someone who was passing by, very cordially, ‘Excuse me, could you tell me the way to the train station?’. He stopped and looked directly at me for a second, then turned his back on me and kept walking. I could not believe that had just happened. Maybe there was some sort of a space continuum void and I lost part of my life, the part where he was explaining me the way. Maybe I reached hell and no one would ever speak to me again. Maybe I went nuts… but all those thoughts vanished minutes later after looking to a woman with nice curves and great legs covered by black stockings, passing by, which made me realize that it was not hell yet.
Days later I started using the bus to reach the construction area where my team is designing a new apartment building near Hellsinki. When I went there for the first time, I thought that maybe something happened in the city, which made everybody silent and stun. The following trips were exactly the same. I could hear the humming of the engine, the wheels crashing the rubble outside, but no speech. ‘Maybe something is wrong with me’ I thought. ‘Maybe I used my earphones too loud and now my mom’s worst predictions were true and my ears lost contact with the world around me.’ But it wasn’t me, it was them, Finns. Nobody spoke…
…
The whole trip, everybody was silent. I heard a cell phone ring once, but the girl who answered it was so silent, that I couldn’t even hear her. Amazing. When I got home and asked my girlfriend, she said that was normal. ‘We’re not supposed to let strangers know what’s going on our lives’ Now that sounded boring. So I got to keep myself to myself now? What kind of life would that be?
But then I realised. They do that in phone calls too! Hell, that doesn’t make any sense either. I was talking to an engineer not long ago and I was questioning him some structural concerns… but after he replied some ‘Yoo, no nii.’ (by the way, that sounds like a Monty Python sentence) he went silent on me. There was NO answer on the other side because he decided to think, with me hanging on the other side of the line. ‘Hell! I’m paying here! Can you give me a damn answer today?’
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The Foreigner Feeling
I've always tried to look like a natural when I am at a foreign country, but there are a number of things I just cannot avoid that make me stand out in the crowd.
That wasn’t any different in Helsinki for the last few days. Right from the start I decided to change the way I dress, not only to feel integrated but also to cope with the incredibly low temperatures. My fashionably Latin casual makes me stand out, and I cannot use my sunglasses anymore. But that wasn’t too bad, although I don’t really like to wear sweat pants when I go shopping.
I spent the whole week feeling weird right after crossing the street and I couldn’t understand why. Finally I figured it was because of the way people stared at me. Every time I crossed the street, people looked at me as if I was a lunatic. It took me a few days to understand that every single time I did it, nobody else followed. You see, where I come from, it is natural to cross the street if there aren’t any cars in a 5km radius. Apparently in Helsinki, if it is red, everybody respects it. That's so crazy! Even if it is raining cats and dogs, even if there are no cars in the street, even if it late at night and everything is as silent, Finns will wait for the green light. I can see the point, and I’ll try to do the same, but to every Finn out there, don’t judge me if I cross with a red light. You see... it’s a cultural thing. Hell, I even cross the street back home when it’s red and cars are cruising by. Coming to think about it, sometimes back home cars pass when it’s red for them too and we need to run othersise... hell, that’s a whole new story.
That wasn’t any different in Helsinki for the last few days. Right from the start I decided to change the way I dress, not only to feel integrated but also to cope with the incredibly low temperatures. My fashionably Latin casual makes me stand out, and I cannot use my sunglasses anymore. But that wasn’t too bad, although I don’t really like to wear sweat pants when I go shopping.
I spent the whole week feeling weird right after crossing the street and I couldn’t understand why. Finally I figured it was because of the way people stared at me. Every time I crossed the street, people looked at me as if I was a lunatic. It took me a few days to understand that every single time I did it, nobody else followed. You see, where I come from, it is natural to cross the street if there aren’t any cars in a 5km radius. Apparently in Helsinki, if it is red, everybody respects it. That's so crazy! Even if it is raining cats and dogs, even if there are no cars in the street, even if it late at night and everything is as silent, Finns will wait for the green light. I can see the point, and I’ll try to do the same, but to every Finn out there, don’t judge me if I cross with a red light. You see... it’s a cultural thing. Hell, I even cross the street back home when it’s red and cars are cruising by. Coming to think about it, sometimes back home cars pass when it’s red for them too and we need to run othersise... hell, that’s a whole new story.
Friday, October 16, 2009
The Finns
I remember that my dad allowed me to sip some wine when I was a kid. I didn’t like it of course, I just wanted to taste it. Maybe that’s one of the reasons why nowadays I can appreciate a glass of wine casually, without getting drunk. This week I learned that Finns can’t do that. If they start drinking… that’s it. They just start, there’s no end to it.
Friday and Saturday nights are marked in every Finns calendar with a “get wasted” sign, and maybe that’s why the tax on alcohol is so high. Although I hate to be the one to say it but, according to the amount of drunk people you have walking around in Hellsinki, that tax isn’t working. I managed to cruise around the city for a few times with my girlfriend. (Oh by the way, remember my friend and that problem with the one bed only on her apartment? Not a problem anymore. Apparently I misunderstood her. She was inviting me to live with her… you know… as a couple. We had never dated before, but it seems that that’s the way it goes. When she got home the night of my arrival we could get everything straighten up and just like that... we were dating. But I’ll dig into that some other day.)
So as I was saying, it is kinda cool to cruise around Hellsinki, jumping from bar to bar, until 23h or 24h. After that, you can’t find a sober soul anywhere. Everybody is stumbling around the city and screaming out loud completely drunk. Finns are strict and uptight every minute of the day, and I guess that they need those weekend night moments to release themselves.
That’s why every night I went out, either I ended up with a guy leaning on my shoulder speaking too close to my face trying to tell me how great they can play guitar, or with a drunken girl hitting on me. Now, on a normal situation I wouldn’t complain about the girl hitting on me, especially if she’s drunk. But not when I’m holding hands with my brand new girlfriend! Yeah, that happened. Even though I didn’t do anything, I got home last Saturday and just like that, I had to sleep on the sofa for a couple of nights just because I paid too much attention to a cute girl. It was Hell. My Finnish girlfriend can scream.
After a couple bad nights sleep I decided to walk around the city during the day to relax and I ended up at this wonderful small café in Eesplanadi. I sat outside drinking my tea, they gave me a blanket to put on my legs (as if that is enough when the temperature is -5ºC) and before I knew it I started chatting with a fairly nice man about the weather. Soon we were changing impressions about countries we’ve visited. The conversation sloped over to the news and corruption came up (yeah we were talking about Italy), and I told him some of my own experiences with governmental facilities and bribes until I said as a joke “Every country is corrupt in its own way. I bet every country has their own little pyramid scheme. hahaha”.
It was a mistake. That was THE drop that spilled the glass.
He became very serious and rose to his feet angrily. Maybe he was drunk, I don't know, but with a sober tone looking down at me directly in the eyes, said: “We are Finns. We are not corrupt. Hannu Kailajärvi was an exception. Don’t start accusing the nation because of one man.”, and then left.
I sat there, holding my blanket and my cup of tea, everybody around looking at me negatively. Of course I thought that he started drinking when he was little and he never stopped... But later I searched about it when I got home. Apparently he was right, that Hannu was the only one caught in a Finnish pyramid scheme, Maddof style, under the name “WinCapita”. That man in the coffee house, as well as all Finns I believe, take those actions personally. They are correct people, never fraudulent, always lawful, and that pyramid scheme was an ugly stain in their perfect behaviour (except for Friday and Saturday nights).
Of course I know those schemes are ridiculous, a failure and an economical disaster, besides illegal… but that man’s attitude made me think… How the Hell can I bribe the Hellsinki city hall to get this project approved if all Finns are like him?
Again, I’m a Latin!
Rules? What’s that?
Friday and Saturday nights are marked in every Finns calendar with a “get wasted” sign, and maybe that’s why the tax on alcohol is so high. Although I hate to be the one to say it but, according to the amount of drunk people you have walking around in Hellsinki, that tax isn’t working. I managed to cruise around the city for a few times with my girlfriend. (Oh by the way, remember my friend and that problem with the one bed only on her apartment? Not a problem anymore. Apparently I misunderstood her. She was inviting me to live with her… you know… as a couple. We had never dated before, but it seems that that’s the way it goes. When she got home the night of my arrival we could get everything straighten up and just like that... we were dating. But I’ll dig into that some other day.)
So as I was saying, it is kinda cool to cruise around Hellsinki, jumping from bar to bar, until 23h or 24h. After that, you can’t find a sober soul anywhere. Everybody is stumbling around the city and screaming out loud completely drunk. Finns are strict and uptight every minute of the day, and I guess that they need those weekend night moments to release themselves.
That’s why every night I went out, either I ended up with a guy leaning on my shoulder speaking too close to my face trying to tell me how great they can play guitar, or with a drunken girl hitting on me. Now, on a normal situation I wouldn’t complain about the girl hitting on me, especially if she’s drunk. But not when I’m holding hands with my brand new girlfriend! Yeah, that happened. Even though I didn’t do anything, I got home last Saturday and just like that, I had to sleep on the sofa for a couple of nights just because I paid too much attention to a cute girl. It was Hell. My Finnish girlfriend can scream.
After a couple bad nights sleep I decided to walk around the city during the day to relax and I ended up at this wonderful small café in Eesplanadi. I sat outside drinking my tea, they gave me a blanket to put on my legs (as if that is enough when the temperature is -5ºC) and before I knew it I started chatting with a fairly nice man about the weather. Soon we were changing impressions about countries we’ve visited. The conversation sloped over to the news and corruption came up (yeah we were talking about Italy), and I told him some of my own experiences with governmental facilities and bribes until I said as a joke “Every country is corrupt in its own way. I bet every country has their own little pyramid scheme. hahaha”.
It was a mistake. That was THE drop that spilled the glass.
He became very serious and rose to his feet angrily. Maybe he was drunk, I don't know, but with a sober tone looking down at me directly in the eyes, said: “We are Finns. We are not corrupt. Hannu Kailajärvi was an exception. Don’t start accusing the nation because of one man.”, and then left.
I sat there, holding my blanket and my cup of tea, everybody around looking at me negatively. Of course I thought that he started drinking when he was little and he never stopped... But later I searched about it when I got home. Apparently he was right, that Hannu was the only one caught in a Finnish pyramid scheme, Maddof style, under the name “WinCapita”. That man in the coffee house, as well as all Finns I believe, take those actions personally. They are correct people, never fraudulent, always lawful, and that pyramid scheme was an ugly stain in their perfect behaviour (except for Friday and Saturday nights).
Of course I know those schemes are ridiculous, a failure and an economical disaster, besides illegal… but that man’s attitude made me think… How the Hell can I bribe the Hellsinki city hall to get this project approved if all Finns are like him?
Again, I’m a Latin!
Rules? What’s that?
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
The Arrival
Everything was going great until I stepped out of the airport in Vantaa. That's when I realized my life would never be the same, but I will get to that later.
I am a Portuguese architect and I came to Finland because of some projects. The prediction is to stay a year working on designs with some studios and afterwards oversee the beginning of the construction. I was kinda thrilled when my company, PORMENOR architects, sent me up here. I know some Finns already and I have one really good Portuguese friend living in Helsinki, so everything seemed perfect. I said goodbye to my big family, packed my bags, and made some contacts to find a place to live. I was right about to book a hotel, when a friend sent me an e-mail, saying I could stay with her for a few weeks until I would find an apartment. That sounded lovely... so I thought. Basically, from the moment I step foot in Helsinki, everything went wrong, and I will tell about you my adventures in this city every week, so you can keep track of everything, without any secrets.
The moment I stepped out of the airport I was full of energy and excited to begin a new life. I had left my sunny Portugal and my family behind during September. My plane arrived early in the morning, at 6h am. I walked out proudly with my sleeves rolled up and my sunglasses in my hand, ready to face the future. But by the moment the glass doors opened, the future hit me in the face with a cold embrace. That’s right, nobody warned me that in this distant north, summer doesn’t exist. Everybody says it does, during July and August, but we all know that’s a lie. The temperature was probably around 2 or 3 degrees, but I am a Latin man, so it felt like -10. I dropped my bags and ran inside the airport again. Everybody was looking at me and laughing. They were all prepared with scarfs and gloves. From the inside I looked at my bags on the ground outside while placing my sleeves down to go out to get them again, and hopefully reach a jacket from one of them. But before I went out, two cops surrounded my bags and started asking questions to everyone that passed by. Some tourists pointed at me... Rats!
It took me half an hour to explain that it was not a bomb, and after looking at every possible document, they let me go but not before making me lose the bus. By the time I got to Helsinki I was freezing cold and my friend was already ready to leave for work and tired of waiting. She let me in and basically said “make yourself at home” and left the house in a hurry.
And here I am. Her house is a studio in Krununhaka, a little bare, with only one room and one bathroom with a bathtub. It only has one bed and the sofa is too small for me... I wonder what was she thinking when she invited me over. I guess I’ll find out in a couple of hours. I’ll keep you posted. Next week I’ll tell you how it went.
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